At just seventeen years of age, I don’t doubt that some will take issue with me calling this a tradition but that’s how I see it. Starting in 2006, the Cincinnati Shakespeare Company has mounted a production of Every Christmas Story Ever Told (And Then Some!) every year except COVID-ravaged 2020. CSC was not the first group to perform the play. That honor belongs to Cape May Stage in Cape May, NJ, which did the play in 2003. Apparently, there were no performances in 2004 then Cape May Stage and two other companies gave it life in 2005. Cape May Stage’s third and final production took place the same year as CSC’s first which means Cincinnati’s sixteen years of performances is the record.

I don’t know when I first became aware of it but it’s certainly been a while, and I long ago read enough about it to think it was something I would enjoy. Yet I somehow had not attended a single performance until this year. They clearly didn’t miss me. This very non-Shakespearean comedy has risen from its very humble beginnings in a downtown bar to become the most popular offering in CSC’s history.

That downtown bar was Arnold’s where the small stage in the courtyard normally might hold a musician or two. The most theatrical things I’ve ever seen there are Reds opening day readings of Casey at the Bat or Who’s On First. I am sure sorry that I missed that first performance and sorry I also missed the next fifteen years even though I don’t know where they took place. I do know, however, one of the actors that appeared in every one of them and this year’s production too. Justin McCombs has been in the cast from the beginning and with the same red Christmas sweater. Other 2022 cast members are Geoffrey Warren Barnes II, Colleen Dougherty, and Candice Handy.

Justin, Geoffrey, and Candice play characters named Justin, Geoffrey/Geoff, and Candice/Candy. Colleen plays Santa Clause who sometimes participates in the action center stage and at other times wisecracks from a stageside sleigh she slowly fills with empty beer — or maybe it’s hard seltzer — cans.

Following some opening remarks from Santa, Candy begins A Christmas Carol but Geoff and Austin aren’t having it. They’ve seen and performed the Charles Dickens story more than enough times and convince her to do every other Christmas story instead. She frequently attempts to return to the original plan with a somber “Marley was dead” but even more frequently participates in whatever story or stories are the focus of the moment.

As one online reviewer somewhat comically (IMO) complains, they don’t really tell EVERY Christmas story but they sure tell a bunch or at least little bits of them. And they sing bits of a bunch of Christmas carols and describe (none too accurately) a bunch of Christmas traditions from around the world. There’s How the Grinch Stole Christmas, It’s a Wonderful Life, A Charlie Brown Christmas, and a ton of others and all are lovingly skewered. To deliver all those stories, Justin, Geoff, and Candy must each fill dozens of roles and they do so wonderfully. For the audience, identifying each character and story is a large part of the fun. Sometimes the roles are coordinated and sometimes things are something of a smash-up like when Clarence the guardian angel visits Ebenezer Scrouge. The script has obviously been updated over the years to include references to current events. This time around, Ye appears as a spokesperson for fruitcake and Santa admits to buying up all of the Taylor Swift tickets.

Every Christmas Story Ever Told (And Then Some!) runs through the end of the year (2024 link here) and can provide some real laughs during a time that can be really stressful to some. Of course, those laughs will only come if you don’t take yourself or your Christmas classics too seriously. I did not see an official age requirement but maybe there should be one. Adult topics and humor are sprinkled about along with the tinsel and fake snow.

Playscripts handles licensing for this play and many others. It is where I learned of that first production in Cape May and other details. Most of what I learned there was not at all surprising but one accidental discovery was. The website provides full production history and allows it to be filtered by state. I filtered it by Ohio in order to more easily check Cincinnati’s history and was surprised to see my high school alma mater on the list. The Drama Club of Ansonia High School, which even now has just over 200 students, performed the play in 2014.